(Originally published in G&W Gazette Jan 1997)

Alcatraz, also known as "The Rock", was once the prison with the hightest security in the United States. A recent film called "The Rock" also took its scenes on Alcatraz. If "The Rock" were a hotel, it should have the following facilities:

  • Guaranteed Room with a view (facing the San Francisco Bay)
  • 24-hour Security (well trained wardens)
  • Catering to selected clientle
  • "Bars" in every room (iron ones ... no whiskey, brandy or vodka)
  • All drinks are on "the Rock"

J.F. Kennedy says "Ask not what the country can do for you, but what you can do for your country." But as you are upgrading your computer, remember the motto, "ask not what you can do for your computer, but what the computer can do for you."

Mrs. Chan had her credit card stolen. The credit card company phoned her home and it was Mr. Chan who answered the call.

"Sir, do you know that your wife's card had been stolen?"

"Yes, I do."

"So do you want to stop the account?"

"No, any thief would certainly spend less than my wife."